Today is the one year anniversary of the Farmer Fred Rant...a perfect opportunity to revisit that first post...especially since I am staring at sooooo many chores that need to get done, soon, around here.
If I recall correctly, this first post, "The Joy of the Imperfect Garden", was a tongue-in-cheek response to another blogger's entry, rationalizing the messy parts of the yard.
My sincere thanks to all of you regular readers. And to you irregular ones...may I suggest prunes?
Here are valid excuses for maintaining your yard the way you do:
When complaints arise about tall weeds:

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Dandelions attract beneficial insects, including lacewings and ladybugs!
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Complaints about low, unpruned tree branches that are not in anyone's way?

Shade preserves soil moisture, helps prevent sunburn on trunk.
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Dead flowers on roses upsetting the in-laws?

Rose hips build a stronger rose bush; and, great as a healthy tea!
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Green, weedy areas beyond vegetable garden have relatives wondering why you are soooo lazy?

It's a grasshopper trap crop!
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Lots of wrinkly noses, upturned at your spotted spurge?

It's a low growing, easy care groundcover.
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Piles of tree trimmings attracting unwanted attention?

It's songbird habitat. They control the bad bug population, including tomato hornworms.
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Pile of garden debris, way in the back, discovered by party guests?

Tell them it's a passive compost pile!
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Low soil level in potted plants have parents making little remarks?

That low soil level allows more water to be absorbed without overflowing!
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Weeds in lawn have the purists clucking?

Weeds? That's clover, which adds nitrogen! Nature abhors a monoculture.
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Does that unkempt wildflower area have mom reaching for the clippers?
It's bee food!
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Do those plants that are crowding out others have the neat freaks in a tizzy?

That plant in the middle? It's deciduous. So, those outer plants "add winter interest."
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Did the local garden expert note that the citrus rootstock is taking over entire plant?

Thick rind on ugly fruit is great for zest!
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Did someone point out that your rose bush is growing from below the bud union?

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Unsightly Tree Stump got folks trippin'?

You're decomposing it the Amish way!
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Does that collection of scraggly plants in a corner of the yard have neighbors wondering?

It's your tax-deductible orphanage for unloved flowers!
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Do all the feral cats in your yard have folks thinking your one step away from "bag lady time"?

Gophers keep them fat and happy! (just don't overfeed them!)